I have a frame that sits on my windowsill.

It greets me when I wake each morning.

In this frame is a postcard my Mum gave me.

She gave me this postcard when I moved to London when I was 19 years old.

I’d got a place on a part time foundation acting course at a drama school.

I’d found a job to support me and pay for the course.

I’d found a flat.

I knew NOBODY.

At all.

And I’d never lived away from home before.

(Unless you count 2 in patient treatments at eating disorder clinics. #livingmybestlife)

I look back now and see how utterly brave I was.

I had starting recovering from my worst relapse of anorexia, and off I went to London.

The post card my mother gave me says,

‘Tell me, what is that you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?’

I often forget that this postcard is there.

But when I do it reminds me to GO BRAVELY.

To keep striding forwards.

To make brave choices.

To live BOLDLY.

After living in fear throughout my teenage years, I made myself a promise to do things that SCARED me.

To go BRAVELY.

I dyed my hair bright orange.

I auditioned for my top choice drama school and got in.

I moved to London.

I auditioned and got chosen to perform on Shakespeare’s Globe stage as part of the Sam Wanamaker festival.

I networked and put myself forward (even though I wanted to CACK myself)

I booked a trip to Italy.

I booked a solo trip to Paris.

I went on dates.

I went feet first into a new relationship.

(Which then ended. Live and learn.)

I put myself forward for things.

I put myself out there.

I did things that scared me.

I made mistakes.

But I grew.

Everything I’ve ever done which was SCARY, has always ended up amounting to good.

The scary things encouraged GROWTH.

When going through my recovery from a severe depressive episode at the beginning of this year, I bought myself a Mantra necklace with the mantra,

‘She who is brave is free.’

And I have been brave.

I’ve GONE BRAVELY.

I’ve been to the bottom and back again.

Decided to fully engage in recovery even if that means letting some things go.

I’m bravely making changes in my life.

Which is why I’m planning on getting a tattoo of this mantra.

To remind myself of this bravery.

Now I’m going to refer back to an article I wrote previously about the ‘quarter life crisis’.

The German psychologist Erik H. Erkison proposed the idea of the ‘identity crisis’.

And that humans face 8 crises in their life time.

The ‘Identity vs Role confusion’ crisis was originally when theorized in the 1950s, the time between 11-18 years old. In which you question,

‘Who am I? Where am I going with my life?’

Due to many different social changes, including increase in student debt to name one, this has now changed and delayed.

So as a generation, these questions are now being asked between 20-35.

To re-evaluate what you are doing with you’re life.

To re-evaluate who you are,

What you do,

Who you associate with.

Rather than choosing to sit in stagnancy or misery,

This is GOING BRAVELY.

To question the ingrained thoughts in your head,

To jump feet first in to new experiences,

To go for the things you dream about,

That is going BRAVELY.

To go through a quarter life crisis or a mid life crisis is not something to be pitied or FROWNED upon,

It should be seen positively,

‘Well done you for choosing HAPPINESS over what you THINK you SHOULD do.’

Obviously if this means leaving your wife and kids and killing a man, then not so much ‘Well done you!’

But there comes a point in everyone’s life where you have to consider what is more important,

Happiness

(Change)

or

Stagnancy

(Staying the same)

I chose to move to London because I wanted to train to be an actor and I didn’t want to live in my home town anymore,

I’ve chosen to end relationships that were no longer healthy or happy,

I’ve chosen to completely re-evaluate the way I operate and think.

I’ve chosen to let go of things that no longer make me happy.

What does bravery mean for you?

I want to write down the things that you have done that are BRAVE.

Whether that be applying for your dream job, having your first child, ending a toxic friendship/relationship, going to ask for help for a mental health problem, changing careers because it no longer makes you happy, booking that backpacking trip or leaving the house for the first time in a week.

How have you gone bravely?

And how could you go more bravely?

Ask yourself the question….

‘Tell me, what is that you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?’

What is it you want to do with your life?

Even if that it isn’t a five year plan.

But for the next year.

If you knew you only had 3 years left to live, what would you CHANGE?

How would you want to live it?

How can you go BRAVELY today?

Here’s a way you can go bravely with breakfast.

With what seems like an odd breakfast.

But is a great brave change to your morning routine.

Mexican Chocolate Zoats.

Putting courgette/zucchini in your oatmeal seems COMPLETELY CRAZY, right?

It adds extra moisture, fibre and vitamin C and you can’t even taste it. It absorbs the flavour of what you put into your oatmeal.

I’ve spiced mine by with cacao, cinnamon, a touch of cumin and chilli flakes.

It adds a spicy chocolately flavour which kicks off your metabolism and stabilizes your blood sugar levels.

I’ve also added Pip and Nut’s Chocolate Orange Almond Butter for extra protein and natural sweetness, however you could easily use a different chocolate nut butter or a plain almond butter with a dash of maple syrup.

It’s spicy. It’s chocolatey. It’s a delicious change to your day.

Mexican Chocolate Zoats

What you’ll need:

• 45g oats (double quantities as you go if making for more than one person)
• Plant based milk (enough to cover oats)
• 1/4 grated courgette/zucchini
• 1 and 1/2 tbsp of cacao
• 1 tsp of cinnamon
• 1/2 tsp of ginger
• 1 tsp of chilli flakes (depending on how brave you feel add more or less)
• 1 tbsp of chocolate nut butter (I used Pip&Nut’s chocolate orange almond butter)
• A pinch of salt
• (Optional) 1 tbsp of Chocolate Protein Powder (I used Macacha‘s Beauty Cacao Blend)
• Fruit to top (I recommend blueberries or raspberries)

How to make it:

• Put oats into a pan or bowl with the grated courgette, cinnamon, cacao, cumin, chilli flakes, pinch of salt, and optional protein powder. Stir till all mixed.
• Top with plant based milk . Put enough plant based milk to cover the oats. The courgette adds extra moisture. Add more milk as you go, if needed.
• If heating on the stove, heat on a low heat, stirring gently. Keep stirring till at consistency that is PERFECT for you.
• If heating in microwave, heat for 2 mins. Stir. Heat for another 2 mins. Heat for 1 min more if you like your porridge THICK.
• Top with chocolate nut butter, fruit and some extra chilli flakes, if you’re feeling brave.
• Sit down with your oats and smell the warm, spicy, chocolately oats. Aren’t you brave this morning? EnJOY.

Go bravely, dear ones.

Much love,

Joy xx